Monthly Archives: January 2011

Lifeless Love

Lifeless love

Here I am drowning in this place called life.
All around me living on edge or uderground.
Tears falling like rain umongst my face from my eyes.
Holding in my heart this lifeless love of one flame of hope holding me here.
Wising each day that we’d honestly get there.
Feeling unsure with nothing but breeze entering through this wide open door.
My emotions high and heavey ready to cry again of the tears which just won’t stop.
Life holding me in one locked in place unable to find the button of release.
Hope running slim to none, yet somehow still holding on.
Thinking each day of a new tomorrow, a better tomorrow.
drowning within myself filling my very lungs i breath with filling them with fluid that won’t disperse anywhere.
Living this lifeless love, the only love i now know.

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Posted by on January 27, 2011 in Uncategorized


Snowy days

Snowy days
white as could be.
Snowy days
you put the fire on
watching it burn,
hearing it’s crackle sound

Snowy days
brings the kids to life
schools and businesses closed
danger zone ahead for roads
snowy days
Kids asking mommy to take them out to play
it’s so cold you keep trying to push it all away

Snowy days
hot chocolate can stay
cozy up in a blanket,
put in a movie is the good snowy day life for me

O’ but the kids disappointed,
they can’t go out and play
ok okay wipe those tears away
Snowy Days

Snowy days
building snowmen
igloos and forts
sledding and snow angels
much, much more…
Ok snowy days

I guess we can play
I’ll put my adult life away for now
returning to my childhood filled with dreams
looking into natures eyes of the fun at play in these every snowy days

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Posted by on January 27, 2011 in Uncategorized


Don't Want To Loose You Within Me


 As I look into your eyes through the beams of soft gentle lighting I see nothing more or less than beauty behind the lids which close into the center of your soul. with quiet spirits surrounding you i hear your mellow voice whispering in the night. your hair resting on your brow. your breath carrying with the wind. so subtle that I sometimes forget your there your skin so smooth like baby’s breath. with your gotee sweet as could ever be. Your touch calming me in a warm embrace never without moment. Together our spirts rein throughout the night. not a sound breaking the silence of our intamite balance of love within our hearts, souls and mind. Your beauty brining out the best of life in me. not even silence could break the feelings we show and have for one another.

To have you here is my one last dream i hold within my empty picture frame When is it to be? you my dear mean so much to me in human mind and spiritually. your strength holding me up. your wisdom giving me hope your sexy you making me think i did good but i don’t diserve you. Saying but if I don’t i won’t be happy. You make me me happiest I could ever be. I don’t want to loose that within me. I miss you so, you just never imagine or even know. You complete me and mean the world to me. I don’t want to loose you within me. keep us embraced so we together unite into one spiritually and naturally.

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Posted by on January 26, 2011 in Uncategorized


Hatred He Sees In Me

I see in his eyes the intense burning flames. His voice how hot on my neck. Hos tone piercing me like a knife. Striking like lighting any chance he can. Though he says he loves me i can nolonger see. I only see in eyes sight the hatred he has in me. I know i screwed up on him; but that was the past. The begining in time with us. When there was uncertainty and lust. A time unfamiliar and unsure of confidence. A time i marked and said sorry for. Eight years now i have remained his strong hold. Though that doesn’t seem to mean a thing i still remain to see only the hatred towards me. I feel the heat burning my skin when he gets close to me. He burms me to the very inner core,getting under my skin like a parasite. The sad feelings begin to tale way as the hatred in him full fledge attack at me. He can not see how this fire he is burning hurts me so. The pain so intense that i can not even fully cry as depression build deep inside of my spine. Then anger and void begin to overtake me physically harming my coat that is on me just to feel the relief that i hide. He feels no remorse for how he makes me feel. Nor any love like we used to hold dear. Its all a big sword charging me down. Draining what energy i have from the hatered i see. He feels no love but claims he does. Though even sherlock knows these actions of hatred are not love but a disquise to hide. I messed up yes but that was long ago a place of comfort i did not know. It passed me by and i learned from things. I became my new me. The mother that he made me. We made a vow before we became us to stay friends throughout everything we’d ever share. No matter what termoils tried to cease we would fight thru it to remain happy and close like we were in that day. Though he is blinded in that mow with me aeeing nothing between us but hatred in me. I have time and time again before thos day said sorry to him and walked away. Why stay where i was at the time then when it was wrongs and i want rights. I can not see lo e anymore just the hatred he has in me. I feel all the emotions still in my heart but they don’t meet with what my brain knows as fact all the actions show a different view. Let me ask you reader…what do you see in this story i tell of his hatred in me.


Posted by on January 22, 2011 in Uncategorized


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Posted by on January 21, 2011 in Uncategorized