Being lost in the world and feeling no safe haven of your own trying to raise three kids who are at steak of being taken away, while trying to survive from this bitter two faced world of fear and disrespect. Life isnt easy while people look at you like a villain when you live homeless in transition and confusion yet. It’s really them who dont understand or even know what life is like for you. Yet they gloat as if they do. I try harder and harder yet to keep my head held high and my smile wide. Yet daily life is still the same and nothing has gone different or changed. With seven years without a job now and no roof to call my own, handicapped raising three kids on my own splurging on scraps and change to make enough change to make all ends meet.
A christmas made from gift cards of my money I have gained and saved. My emotions felt stay focused on one thing….the embrace of christ pulling me thru as my tears still fall from within both my eyes as I only continue so strong to try.
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My Deepest Everything
We rarely speak anymore
Yet we pass like two ships sailing the wide seas together
Other thoughts always crossing each others minds day and night
Yet your always there and never here by my side
You really think that that is alright
I’d rather be cuddling with you both day and night with you always and forever at my side
Not just a figment in time passing me by
Not just a thought or dream crossing my mind
I want to hold your name and be proud that I am yours and announce that you are forever mine
I want to make love for real and make the love we feel real and not just a word of the time within life
I dont just want to speak and say how we feel
I want to show you and feel it so much more. I want everything. I want it all to be sereal.
I want a life meant to be for real
I want to be outdoors with you hearing the call of a great horned owl overhead.
I want to be in your arms and holding hands in and out of my bed.
I want to cuddle next to the warm fire every holiday and in the cold
And ride horseback along a moonlit and sunlit beach
I want you to truly be my deepest everything.
The Hand That Reaches
The hand that reaches out
Is the hand that’s meant to save
to grasp and embrase in tightness, love and understanding of many and all things
the hand that reaches out digs it’s own path and keeps it maintained
it’s the hand that will hold you high not letting you fall to the ground
it’s the hand that you will brag about and lend out for a friend who is in desperate need
It’s the hand you’ll keep around as long as it still grabs on strong that of a forever true friend.
the hand that reaches out is one that will never leave your side.
that will be the hand that hangs on to you and holds tight to yours walking you thru life
This hand embrasing yours never letting go
guiding you forward knowing always what’s got the best for you
it’s the hand that will lead you thru your dearest endevors and throughout your journeys in life
it’s the hand that will keep you walking tall and remind you to hold your head up high
the hand that reaches out is the one that will make a change
the hand that reaches out will give you what you need
it’s the one who will help you find a brighter tommorrow
give you a better day and help you always to find your way
the hand that reaches out is the one with the promise for tomorrow
who will be the voice for the future
who will remain with you for life
It will not leave you to sink and drown in sorrow
or leave you alone when you’re in fear
It will bring hand together lifting you up in prayer
the hand that reaches out will make you stronger holding on together
it will keep you open so that you are able to stay strong and find your own journey home
the hand that reaches out will not walk away when you call on it
it will be there in an instance never to let you down
this is the hand that I want
a forever friend with me
keeping me above them and helping me within my needs
this is a hand that keeps you happy and gives you what you need
it shows you all your worths and knows exactly what you diserve
this is the hand that reaches out
paying it forward
changing time
changing life
changing you and your own life
Mystery Untold
Where you live an everyday constant unknown in life you live in life with unanswered questions and fight
Never knowing what the next day to come will bring or what shall bring you inside.
With nothing to render and no more to hide
You live out your life to full with so much unanswered and so many a mystery building inside.
Nothing seems firm or fit together
Nothing learned alone or lost in faith
Everything with mystery and so may more paths unfound.
Life under construction and new journeys and secrets still be found while fantastical things like are mermaids real or not
still have so much time ahead for you to still continue to ask.
With answers still waiting to be found.
I continue to hold hope and belief that all is possible and maybe one day this one answer will be next to be learned as my hope continues on while mystery untold still sits alone in the unknown.
….
Love love that comes upon us
Love feels great believe me I know
In progress and written by BriAnna
Age 7
My Thoughts Remain
I want to be everything you see fit for me
Yet I can’t even see a size that feels compfortable to me
I try and try to look past what’s within the eye
yet the content and safe feeling just runs away.
You honestly mean the world to me.
But contentment is not my best thing within life right now
I want to show you how true that my feelings are but with you not here to show
it makes it hard when I open up best within my compfort within my home
Each Day I talk to you makes an even better smile to share the day after
while my thoughts remain on the could be’s
I relive by staying stuck in fear and doubts that the days will never become to where I really would love us to be
Lost with myself, my life, and even more lost without you
how I feel with much of my time I share as all the time goes by
Thoughts stay stuck and remain on you
when I would rather show them to you while I am there with you
“Don’t try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It’s the one and only thing you have to offer.” Barbara Kingsolver